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Monday, September 15, 2003  

Aku dapat reply nih.....

Date: Wed, 10 Sep 2003 21:55:19 -0700 (PDT)
From: "XXXX XXXX"
Subject: Re: tak takut ke
To: "asam garam"

kau ni org kaya ke?kau tak takut? bil tel. mlambung,kerna tel. aku.
utk pengehtahuan kau,aku ni bukan dari kalangan org berada
kais pagi makan pagi kais petang makan petang
boleh aku tahu berapa umur kau?
sebab cara kau brcakap macam org yg sangat matang



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Aku tak tau laaa nak cakap aper dgn budak nih.. ting tong betull nak berkenalan laa aper laaa tapi cas cas budak str8.. tapi bila baca email nih saper nak jawap?

Alamak dapat pulak gambo askar nih... interesting soittt

askar




Kalau korang nak tgk Askar korang copy paste laaa .. aku dah give up dgn Blogger aku nih..


URL: http://www.freewebs.com/asamgaram/askar.jpg


Gambo2 indon, sorry guys aku terpaksa censor gambar2 XXX, 18PL semua tak boleh letak laaa nanti aku kena caj pulak sex maniac... gambo indon bogel semua utk aku sahaja wakakakakkakakakakk

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The Quarter-Life Crisis
Young, successful yet unhappy, a young lad asks what's wrong in his life.

by Sal

I am a 28-year-old working professional in the financial industry. In the past one year or so, for no rhyme and reason, I have been feeling melancholic. Such feelings often culminate into bouts of depression. I have tried talking about it with my boyfriend and friends, and have even changed jobs to start afresh. But somehow, I still feel melancholic. Self diagnosis, I think it got to do with the politics in the office (there are a few dangerous characters whom I need to keep a constant watch against) and the distance between my home and office (the train journey can take up to 1 hr 20 mins and I don't drive), as well as my lukewarm interest in some aspects of my job. Yet, I appreciate that jobs are tough to come by nowadays and I cannot simply give up this job without having another one. But I can't find another job, except perhaps start my own business, which may offer me the happiness and flexibility I'm looking for. Of course, it's risky and I may even get a pay cut. I'm two minds about how I should proceed at this juncture of my life. It's not that I hate my current job that much. And I don't even know if it's about my job in the first place!


I've spoken to doctors, and my friends and am learning to take things more easily. I discovered that I'm somebody who takes things too hard very often. Although it's good that I take my job very seriously, I think it's not good now if it affects my mental health, right? I want to make myself believe that I do have a life outside work. As a concrete step, I consciously don't spend long hours in the office and that is working
to a large extent. However, I still keep thinking and even dream about my work! Worrying that I can't keep up to my boss' expectations, that I can't measure up to my predecessor who left this job, and whether I'll make mistakes and cause complaints from clients, etc.... I think I'm going crazy. A good friend of mine once remarked that he knows me well, and sees me as somebody who subconsciously enjoys being 'persecuted',bullied, as all this gratifies me. I tend to agree. Teach me how to let go, and teach me how not to make my work envelope me so much that I feel
so suffocated. What's wrong? What do you do when you feel such melancholy for no rhyme or reason? Is it a form of psychiatric problem?


A counsellor once told me this...

When melancholy comes to me, I evaluate the situation and determine what it is the root of the problem. If I cannot come to a conclusion I distract myself in different ways, such as: go on a vacation, get out of the city for the weekend, write, or call someone I have not contacted in a long while.

You commented about your job. That may be the clue to the entire thing. Although in such bad times, money is of great importance, our physical and mental health is more precious.


You also mentioned that you may start your own business, but seem apprehensive. Have you considered: Would the travel time be shorter? Would the job cut back on travel expenses? Would the hours be shorter - perhaps allowing you to seek a part-time job too? Although the pay is less, are the benefits more? What price do you place on happiness? Take all of these into consideration. Write two lists. Your current position versus the new position. What are all the positive and negative aspects of
each? Removing yourself from the 'dangerous characters' in your office may also be a step in the right direction.


Keep talking to your boyfriend and your friends. Get things off your chest. Let everyone know you are using them as a sounding board. Expel whatever is in you which is bothering you. Get angry. Do whatever it takes to get the feeling away. Perhaps you may even want to listen to your friends. If this job is causing this much agony in you life, leave.

You seem to suffer from what is medically called 'compulsive obsessive disorder'. But that may be too harsh a diagnosis. It may also be what some experts call the quarter-life crisis, where young people in their 20s, who have just left studies and proceeded to the working world, feel lost about themselves. It is not a life-threatening phenomenon. But it is very common and you're not alone. Face it bravely and I'm sure you can overcome all your difficulties. Relax, and keep reminding yourself that you need not try too hard. Smell the roses and know that the world still spins whether or not you have done a good job at work.


Take care and good luck.

posted by asam | 11:17 AM
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